By Christine Grayden
IT’S 2022 and although many forms of historic craziness still abound, the Covid pandemic has brought on its own forms of crazy. Here are some sure-fire signs I’ve detected to look for pandemic craziness in yourself and others:
1. The first thing you do in the morning is check the news for the Covid figures even though you know perfectly well nobody has a clue what they really are. No-one. Anywhere. In. The. World. Knows.
2. You are entering an enclosed space other than your home without wearing an effective mask.
3. You are so convinced that current vaccinations actually work for all Covid at all times that no precautions are necessary. (See 2. Above)
IT’S 2022 and although many forms of historic craziness still abound, the Covid pandemic has brought on its own forms of crazy. Here are some sure-fire signs I’ve detected to look for pandemic craziness in yourself and others:
1. The first thing you do in the morning is check the news for the Covid figures even though you know perfectly well nobody has a clue what they really are. No-one. Anywhere. In. The. World. Knows.
2. You are entering an enclosed space other than your home without wearing an effective mask.
3. You are so convinced that current vaccinations actually work for all Covid at all times that no precautions are necessary. (See 2. Above)
4. You are so convinced that current vaccinations do not work at all for Covid that you might as well just do what you like. (See 2. Above)
5. You are not thinking about, planning or actually growing at least some of your own food.
6. You are no longer shocked by road rage in yourself or others.
7. You stand silently by while workers are subjected to blatant aggression (or subtly vicious micro-aggression) by others, even though you know you would certainly have strongly voiced your support for that worker 12 months ago in a similar situation.
8. You don’t wake up in the morning thinking of ways you can be kind today.
9. You are so focused on unwinding with your dog on the beach that you rationalise that there are no more important species more dependent on the beach than you and your dog are.
10. When you hear that your favourite café or the post office has had to close because of positive cases, you feel more sorry for yourself than you do for the business owners and workers.
11. You can read a letter to the editor attacking elders who have spent decades bettering our community, and unthinkingly agree with the letter writer as a way of venting your inner pandemic rage.
12. You are so blinded by your political bias that you cannot see that a politician of another persuasion may actually be talking sense sometimes.
13. That you are more worried about the stock market than you are about health workers. Who you somehow believe to have superpowers and who should not get exhausted dealing for months on end wearing swaths of plastic and sticking swabs up noses and down throats of impatient people in cars. (Were you one of them in your car?)
14. You have not yet taken up a daily meditation, mindfulness, diaphragmatic breathing or other guaranteed calming practice. Or worse still, you think people who do are actually loonies.
15. You don’t realise you actually need to be doing any of 14.
16. You think having to cook your own meals due to empty supermarket freezers and closed fast food outlets is a major imposition on your lifestyle.
17. You actually think it matters that sports events go ahead. You even obsessed about whether Novak could play or not.
18. You really don’t think it matters if people with ‘mild’ Covid go to work as long as you get your consumer items. (See 16. Above)
19. You don’t believe that Covid can have any long-lasting effects as people seem to get over it quickly. (Thus: See 16. And 18. Above)
20. You catch yourself being pleased when someone you don’t like comes down with Covid.
21. You now know or know of so many people with Covid that you are convinced it doesn’t matter anymore.
22. You think it is a good idea to open borders of the states with high numbers of indigenous people so that you can go there on your caravanning holiday.
23. You firmly believe that the human species is the pinnacle of evolution so cannot possibly be brought down by a virus hardly visible to the most powerful microscope.
I’m sure you can think of many other forms of pandemic craziness you have observed in yourself and those around you. As we go into 2022 I suggest a little introspection might go a long way in getting us through this – however long it lasts.
Take care everyone! And if you really want to protect yourself against the worst of the pandemic, watch you don’t succumb to pandemic craziness!
5. You are not thinking about, planning or actually growing at least some of your own food.
6. You are no longer shocked by road rage in yourself or others.
7. You stand silently by while workers are subjected to blatant aggression (or subtly vicious micro-aggression) by others, even though you know you would certainly have strongly voiced your support for that worker 12 months ago in a similar situation.
8. You don’t wake up in the morning thinking of ways you can be kind today.
9. You are so focused on unwinding with your dog on the beach that you rationalise that there are no more important species more dependent on the beach than you and your dog are.
10. When you hear that your favourite café or the post office has had to close because of positive cases, you feel more sorry for yourself than you do for the business owners and workers.
11. You can read a letter to the editor attacking elders who have spent decades bettering our community, and unthinkingly agree with the letter writer as a way of venting your inner pandemic rage.
12. You are so blinded by your political bias that you cannot see that a politician of another persuasion may actually be talking sense sometimes.
13. That you are more worried about the stock market than you are about health workers. Who you somehow believe to have superpowers and who should not get exhausted dealing for months on end wearing swaths of plastic and sticking swabs up noses and down throats of impatient people in cars. (Were you one of them in your car?)
14. You have not yet taken up a daily meditation, mindfulness, diaphragmatic breathing or other guaranteed calming practice. Or worse still, you think people who do are actually loonies.
15. You don’t realise you actually need to be doing any of 14.
16. You think having to cook your own meals due to empty supermarket freezers and closed fast food outlets is a major imposition on your lifestyle.
17. You actually think it matters that sports events go ahead. You even obsessed about whether Novak could play or not.
18. You really don’t think it matters if people with ‘mild’ Covid go to work as long as you get your consumer items. (See 16. Above)
19. You don’t believe that Covid can have any long-lasting effects as people seem to get over it quickly. (Thus: See 16. And 18. Above)
20. You catch yourself being pleased when someone you don’t like comes down with Covid.
21. You now know or know of so many people with Covid that you are convinced it doesn’t matter anymore.
22. You think it is a good idea to open borders of the states with high numbers of indigenous people so that you can go there on your caravanning holiday.
23. You firmly believe that the human species is the pinnacle of evolution so cannot possibly be brought down by a virus hardly visible to the most powerful microscope.
I’m sure you can think of many other forms of pandemic craziness you have observed in yourself and those around you. As we go into 2022 I suggest a little introspection might go a long way in getting us through this – however long it lasts.
Take care everyone! And if you really want to protect yourself against the worst of the pandemic, watch you don’t succumb to pandemic craziness!